Just Breathe

W got laid off yesterday.

"You might as well go sign up for unemployment" they said "we don't have anything for you."

We knew it was coming. I guess we really were living in denial, just hoping that maybe, oh maybe it wouldn't come. But really? We were just kidding ourselves.

Believe it or not, I am actually *not* freaking out. Yet anyway. I was actually somewhat giddy last night? Laughing a lot. On the surface it probably sounded like genuine laughter...but I suspect if you listened closely, underneath you would hear the laughter of someone teetering on the edge...one of those laughs that starts out great but winds itself up into a jittery, desperate cackling laugh...

I am not freaking out because for the moment, we will be okay. We can survive with my income and W's measly unemployment disbursement for awhile. We have a little money in the bank (and I do mean *little*, but a little is a little better than *none*, right?) and this will really give me a chance to see how serious and dedicated I/we are to our new path to financial peace. If we live below our means, we can make it for awhile. (Why the hell weren't we living below our means when it would have meant we could save for a time like this? THAT is the ultimate question, and is exactly what our path to financial peace is all about...I think I am ready for my heart change, Dave Ramsey.)

I am REALLY hoping that my calculations were wrong, and that we will eek out some kind of tax return this year to help us out in the interim also, but I am not going to count on it. We don't usually get much, compared to a lot of people I know, but we usually get a grand or so, which would be great right now. But it seems that W's work had him down for 2 exemptions for state and fed this year, instead of the 0 or 1 we thought he was claiming, so not looking so good. Ah well, better that we keep our money throughout the year and not let the gvmnt use it all year I guess.

I think the reason I am not freaking out yet is because I am not thinking beyond that. I am not thinking about the prospect that the residential housing market could be in the dumps for a lot longer than just a little bit...not thinking about the fact that this layoff may not last for just a few months...not thinking about what might happen should my husband, who possesses only a high school education, and who has only ever worked in the manufacturing or construction trades, have to look for a different job when every line of work he has ever done is struggling just as much as the construction industry.

W is going to check out a few leads today. Thankfully, he does have a few things to check on and hopefully something will come through.

So for now, I am just going to breathe. What else can I do?